Akin to You
by wAcKaMoLe911
Summary: After an an emotional visit with Lux Bonteri after his mother's death, Ahsoka is left with many questions concerning the Jedi's rules on attachment. In her confusion, she turns to her Master for guidance...


**A/N: So I uploaded this one-shot to the regular Star Wars Page but for some crazy reason they decided to take Ahsoka off the character list (?). So I'm re-uploading it over here, hope you like it! Read and Review please!**

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><p>Jedi Padawan Ahsoka Tano and Senator Padmé Amidala walked briskly to the landing platform for their ship to transport them back to Coruscant. Padmé had secretly come to pay her respects to Senator Bonteri who had been tragically murdered since their last visit. Ahsoka came along in remembrance of the noble senator who had helped to give her a new outlook on the raging battle.<p>

At least…that's what she told herself. She felt so much pain for Senator Bonteri's young son, Lux, when she first saw him. His eyes couldn't reach hers and he sat numbly as Padmé helped to oversee the arrangements for the Bonteri's possessions.

"Ahsoka—could you go check the arrival time of our transport, please?" Padmé asked, checking the time, taking Ahsoka away from her thoughts.

Ahsoka headed off in the direction of the time board. Suddenly, from the side street, a cool hand grasped her arm, pulling her into the shadows.

Trying to keep calm, Ahsoka gripped her lightsaber, ready to strike. The figure dropped its hood, revealing Lux's face.

She sighed in relief, "Lux, you scared me. What are you doing here?"

Lux looked down at the ground, "I had to come—to say goodbye."

"But we already said goodbye," Ahsoka stated, not wanting to repeat the unusually difficult process again.

Lux took a step closer, taking her by the hand, "I had to see you one last time."

"I, uh, I…I needed to, uh," he stumbled over his words. Ahsoka gave his hand a comforting squeeze, "Lux, what is it? You can tell me."

Lux glanced down at their hands; as if finding the confidence to speak his mind from their intertwined fingers, "I needed to thank you, for coming. For helping me," he paused, searching for the right words, "For being here…with me."

His eyes rose up to meet her stare and he leaned in closer still. His free hand went to hold the side of her face and his lips moved to her ear, "Thank you," he breathed.

Ahsoka could feel her heart skip a beat, "Lux, what…" she couldn't finish her sentence.

As he pulled away, both hands moved to hold her face and he stared at her for a moment before he leaned in, kissing her sweetly on the lips.

Ahsoka heard herself sigh and hold his hands to her face. And as her heart soared, her mind became plagued with guilt.

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><p>Hours later the ship landed and as it powered down Padme and Ahsoka stepped onto the landing platform. Anakin was there to greet them.<p>

"How was the trip?" he asked smiling down at Ahsoka. His eyes though, lingered on Padmé.

Ahsoka glanced away, "If you don't mind Master, I'd like to go lie down. It was a long trip."

Anakin nodded, "Of course, Snips…we'll catch up later."

Anakin's eyes followed her retreating figure, as he addressed Padmé, "Is she alright?"

Padmé sighed and began to walk towards the Temple, "She probably just needs a little time. Seeing Lux in his current position was hard for her I think—they've grown very close."

Anakin shrugged off Ahsoka's odd behavior and pulled Padmé behind a thick pillar, "I'm glad you're back," he whispered, his hands around her waist.

"Me too," she replied, reaching up for that inevitable kiss. Her hands wound behind his neck and he pushed closer, deepening the kiss until they heard sounds of the next transport arriving.

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><p>Anakin lightly rapped on Ahsoka's door, "Snips? Are you ready for dinner? Obi-Wan sent over some homemade air cake…" he tried to convince her.<p>

A few moments later Ahsoka appeared and joined Anakin at their small kitchen table.

"Master…I need to talk to you about something," Ahsoka stared down at her slice of untouched cake.

"What is it?" Anakin asked in between bites.

"The Jedi aren't supposed to have attachments, right? But how are we supposed to fully care and protect people if we can't be attached to them? Being separated…it…it disconnects us, makes us different. The Jedi couldn't really want that…could they?"

Ahsoka's blue eyes looked at Anakin, searching for an answer that would justify her actions. Her heart felt attached to Lux, his story, who he was, and who he was to her.

Anakin gulped down his last bite. He hadn't been prepared for this. "Ahsoka, did something happen while you away?"

"You didn't answer my question, Master. Why is it not okay to have those attachments? Why is not okay to be…to be in love?" the last part was barely audible but Anakin understood.

Love. It was such a difficult topic when it came to him. Love had been the best gift he had ever received; yet at the same time it caused him the most grief. He sighed heavily and looked away from Ahsoka's prying eyes.

He didn't want to have this conversation with her. He didn't want to have to lie to her face, to tell her about the reasons why the Jedi were that way when undoubtedly tonight, he would go visit Padme's chambers, waiting until Ahsoka was fast asleep so he could slip away unnoticed.

He avoided her question again, "Ahsoka, what happened? Did that Lux do something to you?"

Ahsoka's eyes went wide, "No, no not at all!" she stood up, walking to the kitchen counter, "It's more…it's more what he did _for_ me." She said slowly.

Anakin remained at the table, "And what did he do… for you?' his hands were shaking under the table, terrified at what she might say.

"Master," she said forcefully, "Master," she repeated until he looked up at her, "He kissed me." She put simply. Anakin's jaw went slightly slack, but Ahsoka didn't miss a beat.

"When he kissed me, I finally understood the attachment I had formed to him from the first time I met him, how much stronger it made our bond. It made sense for me to be there with him; for him to be with me. And Master," she struggled to say the next part, "Master, it felt so _good_. I belonged with him."

She had made her way back over to the table, "I don't know what to do, Master. How can the Jedi forbid something that feels so right?"

Anakin's fingers traced his lips, remnants of Padmé's perfume still lingering on his memory, "I don't know Snips," his hands tingling with the feeling of her soft skin, "I just don't know."


End file.
